The necessity of regular, scheduled exercise, such as you might try to practice at The Gym, is the clearest evidence that the modern lifestyle is totally messed up and unsustainable. We live our lives in such a way that without concerted, health-oriented efforts, we would all become sick and die. Sure it takes several decades but still. The further removed our mode of “making a living” is from making what we need to live the more this is true. OK, I’m way over-simplifying here, which leads me to corporations, like most subjects do. It’s their fault.

Yes, all of it.

I’ve signed up with one of those Community Supported Agriculture thingamajigs where I get a box of organic produce every other week. The ultimate goal is to be good to my body, the planet and organic farmers, and a bunch of similar hippie-esque ideals. But! I also hope that having a regular supply of random stuff will force me to make stuff I wouldn’t ordinarily. I like food a lot, so I’m going to post pictures here since I can’t go around the country making all my friends and family try my tasty treats like I really want to do. I imagine most will be kind of normal concoctions, some will be more fun, but all will be things I’ve never made before. Which is why something as simple as apple pie is here. I’ve never before happened to have a big pile of apples laying around just waiting to be made into pie. Now I have apples all the dang time (although I can tell from this week’s box that summer has finally arrived and with it a welcomed absence of apples)! Because I am crazy it is safe to assume everything will be from recipes I make up, at least that’s been the case so far.

Maybe absolutely everyone else on the internet has already seen this, but if you haven’t, like I hadn’t, you must now because by gosh it’s interesting and fun.

A normal spider web spun by a sober spider:

The web of a stoned spider:

The web of a caffeinated spider:

BONUS SPIDER JOKE

So a spider scientist gets to meet the president.

He tells him of his profession and expresses his support of the war. They get along quite nicely, and the president refers him to some friends who are eager for his expertise and who he promises will pay him top dollah-dollah. As you can imagine, good-paying jobs in the spider researching industry are quite scarce and desirable, so the scientist says, ‘heck yes, sign me up!’ [paraphrased--Ed.]

When he arrives at his new job he’s greeted by an array of high-ranking military dudes, is led into a very serious looking room with maps and charts, etc., and is briefly debriefed. I say briefly to be polite, but the truth is that the scientist interrupted his boss WHILE he was getting the run-down! [scientists are so rude--Ed.] He appears to be experiencing an assortment of emotions including confusion, exasperation, and disappointment, and he exclaims, “Damn it, I’m an Arachnologist not an Iraqologist!!!”

What do you think a potato bug looks like?

Like this?

Or like this?

My personal belief was that the former is a roly poly and the latter a potato bug, but then I heard that some people think potato bugs are what I thought were roly polies. Actually we are all wrong. The first picture is a woodlouse and the second is a Jerusalem cricket (which are fucking disgusting creatures, by the way). Well, now you know.

I realize that is probably common knowledge, but I need frequent reminders. So, since I’m working the morning shift after a scant 3 hours of sleep and trying to keep myself encouraged, here are some various items of news that won’t crush your spirit:

Apparently there is now an inhalable form of insulin. Exubera, which is a fine powder that one huffs through a tube, was approved by the FDA this January and was welcomed onto the U.S. market this month. Interestingly, but not too surprisingly, it is Pfizer and Nektar Therapeutic’s love child.

While snooping around about insulin, I also found this article about an AIDS drug that Pfizer is going to release by the end of the year, which is both exciting and disappointing. I’m glad the big guns are behind an effective and less destructive AIDS treatment so that it will be well funded, promoted, and received, but I foresee major issues with making it available to those who need it most like our dying friend Africa. 

The countdown for when a immunosupressantless life will be a possibility for transplant recipients is well under way, and although this isn’t new news to me, I like to occassionally hunt around for articles about it so I can get all excited and teary-eyed. I mean, wow! Let’s get on that train.