I will only ever know more and more dead people until my memories are almost entirely composed of death.

This makes me so drunk with anger that I can’t think straight.

I don’t generally participate in the video game brand wars, but this seals Playstation’s loss in my mind.

is today. Stores are having sales, banks and post offices are closed, the newspaper’s filled with uncontroversial human-interest stories, and all are decorated with the flag’s colors and tacky stars. I don’t understand why Memorial Day is seemingly practiced as a day of patriotism. What do barbeques have to do with remembering our dead soldiers? I’m not against celebrating, but it should be via the appreciation of life and our relative good fortune, not of the military and cheap crap. Memorial Day is to remind us how awful war is, which considering we’re in the midst of one, is a pretty fucking important remembrance.

And so I return.

My step-dad is dead, my mom a widow, my sister without a father. My step-brother is thoroughly brainwashed by the Army and can speak of nothing non-military. My grandpa continues to get skinnier and weaker. Nevada is looking wonderfully green after an unusually wet winter, but is full of bleakness and confusion via its inhabitants. Everything is torn.

Mexicans who work at American-centric resorts do not like to speak Spanish. My aunt-in-law is now married to a very nice fellow and mostly everyone on that side is jubilantly happy (although this is not necessarily related to the wedding). The verde salsa of the Guerrero state of Mexico is THE BEST EVER. I learned that I very much want a small pool and that I can like fresh strawberry daiquiris. In unsurprising news, people do not like things that are different than they expect or what they are accustomed. But, regarding Mexico, I am optimistic.

What is one word to describe the outcome of my past couple of weeks? OVERWHELMED.

I want to be a cowboy.

I’m afraid of becoming a desperado.

Also, the miscellany section has been busy.